Cri De Cour
by psychedelic aya
Summary: Sasuke/Sakura, only its just Sakura. Sakura and Inner Sakura when discussing matters of the heart. Obsession to the most heightened extent, only when its not obsession at all. At least, not anymore.


**Authoress' Notes:** Why am I posting this in only now when I wrote this eons ago? Well, beats me. Hahahah. -gets shot very badly- Fufufu.

**DISCLAIMER:** Simple etymology says it "dis"--"claims" which mean it doesn't claim. Besides, what would be the use of me saying: "Yo ho ho and a buttle of rum, Kishimoto ain't got nothing on me because I own Naruto!" when everyone else in the world knows that _he_ owns it and that we all love him even though he's a tad bit sadistic (most likely) to his fans anyway?

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**Cri De Cour**  
_by psychedelic aya_

Sometimes, Sakura thinks Sasuke must be sad.

(Even though she can't see him. Even though she can't hear him. Even though she can't feel him.

_Even though he's not here._)

And she thinks that maybe she understands him. Maybe she knows how he feels, because didn't she tell him (once upon a time so long ago) that whatever he felt, she'd eventually feel too? (_I want to think we're connected that way_—)

She was compassionate. _Passionate_. About these things such as feelings, especially, even though it totally contradicted her ways of logical thinking.

She knows how it feels to have the loneliness eat her up inside—_raw, cold and without mercy_—the agony of the heart screaming out for someone, _anyone_, who'd be willing to be there and embrace the pain. And maybe sometimes Sakura knows she wants to take something out of that someone—_everything and anything at all_—bruised and bloody, because she is more like Sasuke than he thinks and she also wants someone to be there—someone to take care of her, to pamper her, to _love_ her—

—And maybe she wouldn't throw it away—but she would (although she was scared to) abuse it because she was _depraved_—

(Because Sasuke—_always and forever_ Sasuke—; he could drag anything he wanted out of her—_anything and everything at all_—without breaking a sweat.)

And she'd ask for nothing in return.

(And maybe Naruto was the same to her, wasn't he? But he had too many other dreams for her to handle. And besides, she couldn't—_wouldn't_—ever hurt the boy who sacrificed his more than what was needed for her dream, her little selfish dream—which may have become his dream as well.)

Naruto loved her that much, and sometimes Sakura wonders why she never felt the same.

(But of course she loved him—_what are you saying_? It's just not in the same way.)

And she'd like to spend her life with Naruto, sometimes; because he could make her smile and because he cared—_but didn't Sasuke care too? Well?_—and because she was selfish and wanted someone to love her. And she knew all the love he spent on her wasn't a waste— because it was _love_, after all, and such an emotion is meant to be given without ever expecting something in return.

Sakura wishes she could give Naruto something back, sometimes. But she just can't, and she thinks she never will be able to.

Because, because, because. _SasukeSasukeSasuke_. It's taken up her mind and her heart and her soul and her entire being—it's corrupted—no, blessed—her whole entirety of self; and nothing (absolutely nothing) can just compare.

_Why Sasuke? He isn't a prince on a white horse_, Sakura would oftentimes tell herself. He wasn't the type of person to understand her like she understood him. In fact, she believed that he didn't love her. At all.

(At this, Inner Sakura would be wryly smiling.

_And so?_)

Sakura thinks Sasuke must be sad.

(Even though she can't see him. Even though she can't hear him. Even though she can't feel him.

_Even though he's not here to know what she thinks._)

But she doesn't care.

That's love.

_Exactly._

**.//FINI** - _January 2006_

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**Authoress' Notes:** Short introspective on how painful Sakura's love can be. And I detest, btw, to those who say she is _blindly_ in love. (No offense, dears.) I don't think she's blind as to what Sasuke is. She knows each and every part of him and yet still accepts him as he is. No matter if he's a bastard, a fool, blah blah blah. She loves him. She loves Team 7, right? (She knows Naruto is the Kyuubi and yet she doesn't care about that, either.) I just feel for Sakura. (_Damn you Sasuke, come back already and strut yourself in your new clothes!_) Ahah. Ahahaha.

Smile. Someone up there loves you.

And no, you don't have to review. No, not really. (Only if, you know, you could.) Fufufu.


End file.
